WW: Don't Stop Believing

"You know Mom...I know it's not the REAL Santa who comes to our family party. It has to be one of his helpers. The REAL Santa is way too busy to come out at this time of year." -Douglas



But just in case it was the REAL Santa, he had to look to see if he could spot the sleigh in the sky after Santa left...

Can my boys please stay little forever?


Angie believes in Santa...and she believes in YOU.

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Why My Jeans Are Crunchy

My dryer broke.


At first I though, "YES!" because I thought this might be my chance to convince my husband to buy one of those snazzy new fangled ones! A RED one with a new front loading washer to match...and maybe a maid to use them (I think BIG).

Well, my dreams of fancy new appliances were summarily SHUT DOWN by husband.

Damn him and his, "I am sure it can be fixed Jenni. Put your Sears charge back in your wallet and go lie down."

What am I supposed to do with the mounds of laundry that are accumulating while we wait for the repairman to come?

Surely it would be MUCH EASIER to just have a new washer and dryer delivered!

Why must I always be the only one who thinks rationally around here???

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Bitter!

17 inches of pure white snoooooow...

I really, really, REALLY wanted a snow day today...

But I did NOT get one.

Hmph.

My boys got a one hour delay...but all that really does is mess up everyone's morning.

So instead, I had to slip and slide my way off the work to deal with the Christmas-crazed children whose craziness is now compounded by a snowstorm.

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Merry Aloha!

Here we are!

It's the last Aloha before Christmas!

Can you believe it?


What are you plans for Christmas Eve this year?

What is your favorite holiday movie?

Were you able to get my gift into the mail yet?
(I'll be waiting by the mailbox!)

Merry Aloha!

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The Christmas Sweater: An Ad for Men!

From the Beautiful! Fabulous! Files...

Christmas Sweater by jenni jiggety

Are you looking for a fashionable holiday gift for a very special lady in your life? Well LOOK NO FURTHER! A snazzy Christmas Sweater is THE way to go this holiday season!

That's right! Trust me! I know what women want! Women like bright, shiny things! They like bells, bows and sequins! A Christmas sweater combines all of those things! What could be better? You think she’d rather have jewelry? I am here to tell you that jewelry is over-rated! Any guy can go to the jeweler and buy diamonds! You want to buy a gift that shows you have STYLE and CLASS.

A Christmas sweater is the perfect gift for your girlfriend, your wife, or both of them! You simply cannot go wrong with one of these timeless Christmas classics!

Just imagine the look on your lady’s face when she tears open her gift to find one of these stunning, sparkly beauties! Oh, yes…she will be speechless! She will be in AWE. She may even cry! And, when she finally is able to regain her composure, she will look into your eyes, thank you lovingly, and then put her new treasure back into it's box (because she will not want it to get dirty, of course). It will truly be a gift she will NEVER forget. And she will assure you that she is going to save it to wear on a very special occasion…

…like Christmas -Year 2068.



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WW: How Can You Miss Me If I Never Go Away?

This picture has nothing to do with anything, BUT since I am SO busy making pictures and cracking myself up, I thought I would share.

I don't know if you noticed (lie to me), but I haven't posted for the last few days!

Truth is, I have been SICK and busy and all around GROUCH-tastic, and I decided to take it out on the internet by not posting on my blog.

Take THAT, internet.

I guess I showed YOU, Al Gore...

Anywho...I am a little less busy (although NOT less sick) so I decided to give the internet a break and come back.

You're welcome!

So stay tuned, because I have quite a diatribe coming up about how much I hate having a sore throat, and I will soon be singing the praises of Motrin and Halls cough drops with pectin!

And you sure don't want to miss that...



If you are interested in some MUCH BETTER Wordful Wednesdays, you should go see Angie.


Angie is the picture of health and holiday cheer, whereas I am all Grinchy and ill.

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Aloha, Shoppers!

So I am going to use my Aloha Friday post to appeal to the internet for some SNAZZY gift ideas!

What should I get my mom for Christmas?

How about my sister?

Teacher gifts...any thoughts?

How about a $75 Yankee swap gift that would be appropriate for a man or a woman?


Come one now...I KNOW you must have some ideas for me. I have been trying to come up with some of my own, but as hard as I try I can only come up with packs of gum and multi-packs of Scotch tape.

Kailani would love to be my personal shopper.

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No See Me Pee

For all the years I have know my husband, he had NEVER seen me sitting on the toilet.

I don't know why I have a little "thing" about it...but I do.

Sheesh! Can't SOME things remain private?

Anyway, my no-see-me-pee streak ended this weekend when one of my kids came into the bathroom while I was going, and then left the door open on his way out. Of course, my husband comes strolling past at that moment...

It was a urination BUST!

He laughed about it later, but deep down he knows whenever he is kissing me from now on, he is going to be thinking about me sitting on the can...

That's it. The magic is gone now. We are officially old people who pee in front of each other and massage one another's corns.

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WW: Enchanted Village

Last weekend, Doug and I took the boys to see The Enchanted Village that had been set up at Jordan's Furniture in Avon, Massachusetts.

(I used to work there, and it is an awesome place...but that is another blog for another day.)

We had to wait for about 45 minutes to get in, BUT from the looks of the maze of roped off area that was empty, it could have been MUCH worse.



The Enchanted Village is set up beautifully inside the warehouse, and the displays are amazing...although admittedly the animated figures are a little creepy...



Every so often, a "snow" storm would blow through while we were touring the displays. It was VERY cool!


The boys LOVED it and spent a lot of time looking at each of the displays!

We had a GREAT time and if you live in the are, I would recommend checking it out.

I would also recommend picking up a batch of the Jordan Marsh blueberry muffins they are selling on your way out. YUM.

Ps....do you think the people at Jordan's would be interested in acquiring a giant Freaky Santa to add their collection? I have one I would be willing to part with for a price (free).




Angie would totally come get my Santa if she lived closer.

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Random Crap I Have to do Before Christmas

1. Design, Order, Address, and Mail Christmas cards.

2. Buy presents. Lots of them. Too many to even really wrap my brain around. There are MANY MANY gifts left to purchase is what I am saying.

3. Take up drinking heavily on weekdays.

4. Wrap presents sloppily. Slap bows on them to cover up my ineptitude as a wrapper.

5. Attend family gatherings and smile a lot even though I'd rather be at home on my couch in my pajamas watching SoapNet and scratching my butt.

6. Consider becoming a Jehovahs Witness, and decide against it because I like my birthday and hate having doors slammed in my face.

7. Bake and consume copious amounts of baked goods.

8. Stop my youngest son from eating every single candy cane on the Christmas tree.

9. Wish there really was a Santa Claus...because I have been a VERY good girl this year and could use a lot of new stuff.

10. Sing Christmas songs until I literally CAN'T STAND it anymore.

Ho Ho Ho.

Keely tried to stop me from linking up to her blog, but I am UNSTOPPABLE.

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Couple Of Quickies

Quickie #1

This struck me as so funny last night that I laughed until I was crying and snorting and gasping for air...



Oh, how I love you FailBlog...

Quickie #2

I think I need this for Christmas:

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Aloha, Swine Line!

So yesterday my city offered an H1N1 flu shot clinic for elementary school aged children, and since my pediatrician seems to be perpetually OUT of the shot, I decided to take the boys down to get them their vaccination.

Oh, how very THRILLED they were...NOT! <-NOT! is making a comeback. I have deemed it so.

Anywho...it was a madhouse. We waited for about an hour an a half to get up to the shot. My children kept voicing their hopeful opinion that perhaps by the time we got up to the front, they would have run out and we would just have to go home. I assured them that they would be getting shot up...there was no way I was waiting in that line for nothing.


The shots came and went...and nobody cried. (Although I nearly did when they told me we had to wait in the observation area for 15 minutes after the shot. Couldn't I just watch them in the car on the way home???)

And now we have to do it all again after 21 days because they need a second dose. Bah.

So did you get the shot for yourself or your family?

Do you think this Swine Flu thing is way overblown?

Did I mention that the woman in front of us in line for an hour and a half smelled like cat pee?

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Word Up (Writer's Workshop)

The year was 1986.

The hair was enormous.

The teeth had braces.

The boobs were (are) as flat as a board.

I was a 7th Grader.

I knew everything about everything, and I was SURE my parents were out to make me as miserable as humanly possible.

Ah, those were the days...


Like all kids in 7th grade, I had awesome taste in music, and my favorite song of the year was this classic little ditty:



Walk Like An Egyptian by the BANGLES!!!!

I taped the video on MTV and would play it over and over...

I would sing all the Susanna Hoffs parts because she was the coolest one in the group and why would I sing any other part but the BEST one, right???


Thinking back on it now, I have NO idea what the lyrics of that song are supposed to mean...

It is just nonsensical musical sing songy FUN!

Either that or it was a metaphor for consumerism and trouble in the Middle East.

One of those.


Slide your feet up the street bend your back
Shift your arm then you pull it back
Life is hard you know (oh whey oh)
So strike a pose on a Cadillac


This not-so-analytic analysis of Walk Like an Egyptian was brought to you by Mama Kat's Weekly Writer's Workshop Prompt.

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WW: Guess Who's Back???

To check out Santa Madness from 2008...go a-clickin' below

Week One

Week Two

Week Three <- My personal favorite

Week Four

Angie Thinks Santa is Kinda Hott...

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